Saturday, September 08, 2007

Stressed out and Hivy

I've learned that when Je is quiet and doesn't tell me about stuff, that she might need some help talking through it. I posted a while back that we were getting into the school routine. And we are, now, but then I might have spoken too soon. Like the very next day, Je broke out in hives. We decided that it might have been nerves with starting school. This would fit with the symptoms, and with the family history, we are a hivy bunch. Frankly, stress upsets the delicate balance our systems have and makes us sick. Cold sores, rashes, etc. So it isn't too surprising that my daughter has similar problems. What is surprising, is that I missed her uneasiness. She was pretty quiet about school, and I thought with all the new she just needed some time to process, so I didn't pry. I let her approach me to talk about things rather than sitting down with her and pushing gently for her to talk. In hindsight, I can see she was a little overwhelmed and wanted some special attention. The day she broke out in hives, I spent a lot of time just asking questions and letting her tell me about whatever she wanted. I didn't hear much new info, but I did get the sense that she needed to tell me. Now, it pours out of her everyday. I know about the kids in her class, recess, lunch, and the "wall." This is the place you spend your recess if you talk when you are supposed to be quiet. Je says she hasn't spent time on the wall but she is worried about it. I told her that I was glad she hadn't lost recess, and that I hoped she listened and was quiet appropriately. I told her that I would be sorry if she had to stand on the wall, but I would understand if it happened and not be angry. What else could I say when I lost untold minutes of my recesses all though grade school on the wall. I would talk to a rock ya'll. I doubt this is a startling revelation to anyone who knows me, I like to talk. And in grade school, I hadn't yet mastered the skill to know when not to talk. Some of you probably wonder if I have to this day. I think Je is getting acclimated and isn't as overwhelmed as she was. Kindergarten is a big transition, and there are a lot of new routines and things to remember. Parenting is a process. Now maybe I have learned something about my daughter that will help me help her as she get older and confronts other new situations. Jo on the other hand will be completely different, I am sure. Isn't God great!

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